Say What?

I love grammar. I have since I was a little girl. English was always a subject for which I had passion and I excelled in it. I know everyone doesn't share my love for English spoken and written well, but at the very least, we can make an effort to follow the rules before we write something or allow something to come out of our mouths. Realizing that human error in the form of typos happen, I'm really thinking outside of what spellcheck may be able to catch. There are times a word is spelled correctly but used in the wrong context. There are also times when common phrases are regularly misstated and accepted anyway because people have been saying them wrong for so long. Repeating the wrong thing multiple times has never made it transform into the right thing. Wrong spans time and space. Having said that, I'd like to go ahead and list some of the misused, misspelled, or misstated words and phrases that get my dander up:

• The thing I am typing this blog entry on is called at LAPtop. It is not a LABtop. I would imagine if there were a labtop, it would be the counter on which one would sit a Bunsen burner and a couple of flasks. However, the thing we actually sit on our laps and use for various purposes is called a LAPtop for the most obvious reason.




• You're vs. your - Um, I really feel this is something that should have been covered and understood sometime during the elementary school years. You're is short for YOU ARE while your implies possession such as, "Is this YOUR laptop?" to which one could reply, "No, it isn't mine. YOU'RE mistaken." I know it may seem minute, but using these improperly can cause some real problems for the reader.




• They vs. Their - It is NEVER okay to say, "They just took they stuff and left." It is not, and never will be, "THEY STUFF". It is their stuff. They simply identifies a group of two or more people. Their is possessive and implies to whom the stuff belongs. And as a side note, THERE is a place and is not to be confused with THEIR.




• Library vs. Liberry -The place we sometimes visit with all the wonderful books, cds, and dvds we can check out as long as we have our handy dandy membership card is called a LIBRARY and not a LIBERRY. A library employs the nice lady or man who constantly admonish us to be silent. I don't know what the hell a liberry is, but if I were to take a guess, I'd say it's something that goes between two layers of crust, is baked, and then served with ice cream.




• Ask vs. Axe - When one would like to make an inquiry, one would simply ASK someone for the answer. We do not AX questions as this sounds as if we are lumberjacks out in the Inquiry Woods chopping down questions. This is more than likely something that can happen on Sesame Street but I doubt it would play out in the real world.

• Could vs. Couldn't - When something is so unimportant that one has absolutely no desire to invest any interest in it, it is safe to say that one "COULDN'T care less.". The phrase is not, "I could care less" as this implies that one actually cares. To say one couldn't care less firmly states that one cares so little it is impossible to have any less concern. I hate it when people say this phrase wrong. It's even in a song which annoys me. I mean, to actually write down and record something so off base simply baffles me. If people actually took some time to think about what they are saying, they'd realize how crazy they sound.

• Know vs. No - To know something implies that one has some type of knowledge of a person, place, or thing. "Yes, I KNOW Tom well. He and I went to college together." On the other hand, NO is a negative response to an inquiry as in, "NO, I've never met Tom."

• Rottweiler vs. Rockwilder - Um, I understand that some people feel comfortable saying the wrong thing after saying it for so long but this has to stop. Seriously. If one is to own a pet, it is incredibly important for that person to know how to spell and/or pronounce the name of that pet. That big old dog in the backyard probably chained to a tree is a ROTTWEILER not a ROCKWILDER. There is no dog called a Rockwilder. While I'm at it with the dogs, one can own a Pit Bull but it is highly unlikely that one, especially a city dweller, would own a Pet Bull. One of these is a species of dog while the other is a huge beast with horns and is not exactly a garden variety pet. If, however, anyone reading this is the happy owner of a pet bull and resides in the city, please let me know so I can avoid happy hour in your home.

I totally understand that everyone doesn't feel the same way about language that I do. To some, language is relaxed and open to interpretation. For me, I believe the occasional slang word is okay to insert in a conversation providing the person using the slang knows it is grammatically incorrect. However, there is a difference between use of slang and use of words completely out of context or use of words that simply do not exist. I believe that once we know the difference, our conversations will be taken to a different level and I don't see a thing wrong with that.